Motion

This year feels like it's moving so quickly. I know, it's a really important year, and lots of things change. Tomorrow I'll be having an interview. I'm really happy I got that placement - it's right where I want to be, now, maybe later, perhaps in ten years. When we read out the forms, my friends all had something funny to say. One of my hazards is infectious diseases, which seems awfully grave for an assistant. Another said aggressive people. But my friend had contact with people altogether as a hazard, which made us all laugh. The ones who wrote that knew her very well indeed.
Today was another friend's birthday. We had a cake meant to serve 4 split between the 6 of us, and like starving wretches we wolfed it down using only spoons, not bothering to split it up. I was unwilling at first, but the cake was delicious, right up until I realised I was off my face with cake. Couldn't think straight for about ten minutes. I never want to see that much cake again. Not in such a small group. Especially if it all has to be eaten in one sitting. Heavens, no.
I have to decide on a theme for my project. I had ten to pick from, and I'm torn between three. Paper engineering which is basically origami, fragments, or disguise. The first is tempting because I'm rather good with origami techniques, and cutting intricate designs appeals to me. The second reminded me of an image I found once, of a series of photographs, all of different parts of a girl, and her hands reached out to hold herself together. Last, is one I could identify with on a very deep level. The mask, inside and out - that holds dangerous, alluring possibilities.

Leila Arab - Mettle

I've always really liked Leila Arab's work, especially the songs from her album Blood, Looms and Blooms.

I think my tastes in music are rather strange. Granted I do like my fair share of pop and classics, but listening to this and things like this - it speaks so me on a much deeper level.

I feel weighed down recently.

I can't really explain it. Or maybe I can, and I just don't think the evidence adds up. I'm just miserable recently, and yet when I'm around other people I can't stop laughing. Am I lying to myself, unconsciously? I feel as if I should be in pain, but I'm not really. In my head though I feel so sad, and yet sadder that it's only sadness that afflicts me so. I feel obsessive over my wants, but I can't bring myself to work towards my goals. Ambition has ceased to matter, but I still feel so driven, and the question is why. It weighs down, it's painful in my mind, but I can't express it, not externally. I am not confused. I just can't seem to care about its presence.

I WROTE A STORY... AND FINISHED IT

It's so huge, like 24 pages of scribbling
I was stuck writing it for SEVEN HOURS
I was supposed to do my science papers today and my graphics and travel writing
but I DON'T EVEN CARE
24 PAGES BRO
I'LL POST IT LATER. When I have the time to type it up, that is.